me.

So I realize as I personal blog I often, if not like always talk about me. How selfish. (and here I am talking about me, talking about me.) But I think for once in my life I'm tired of talking about me.
I understand that new friends and teachers want to get to know me. How nice.
But for classes I have to write an autobiography for my class Gateway (freshman orientation course), a "Where I am From" paper for College writing, a personal calling paper for my Missions of the Church class AND do a presentation of my life in a class.
 
You'd normally think that all these papers would be simple to write, but I'm personally finding them hard. I'm not trying to forget my life in PNG, but as I'm transitioning and starting a new life here I'm trying to focus on the here and now. Be content where I am. I'm excited to be here and I don't want to look back to much and remember all I miss. But these papers are forcing me to go back there. Relive the memories and the scenery. To be back in that moment and grasp that emotions. It's honestly...draining. I'm so emotionally tired and don't know how I'll have the strength to write the Where I'm From one this weekend.

And with friends...The first question after you get someone's name is either "what's your major?" or the MK's least favorite question, "where are you from?". There is really no way around it. I can't lie and say from Ohio, cause then they ask where, how long, why, highschool etc. And they'll find out sooner or later - we do have 4 years together. So I tell them...then they ask a million other questions. PNG is a HUGE part of my life, it made up who I am...but there is more to be then the country. --Do you play sports? Yeah soccer. -Well did you have a team over there? who'd you play? --It's so complicated just to answer simple questions.

So for once in my life I'm exhausted of the "simple questions", of talking about me. I'm tired of thinking about the "good ol' days" and putting my life out there for people to try to understand. So why am I doing exactly that by blogging? Cuz I just needed to get it off my mind and I don't have to answer any questions here. And there isn't a syllabus or outline I have to follow for this. But anyways...venting session. Off to work on my paper. Have a great weekend everyone!!! :)

Couldn't be happier...

Life's jogging along at a pretty fast pace here at college, and my little freshman legs are doing all they can to keep up. But I'm loving it.
I told my mom the other day that I feel like I should be concerned how easy it has been on me. I absolutely love my roommate and we are more than compatible. She is so out going that every-time I go out with her I make a new friend. People here are so friendly, nice and easy going and I feel so comfortable. I've laughed so much the past week that my abs hurt if I laugh. I went to a church with friends this weekend that I really enjoyed and could see myself getting involved with. My professors are funny and caring. My homework is interesting *gasp* and though there is a lot I get it done. And having a Chick-fil-a, Subway & Dunkin' Donuts on campus doesn't hurt. Friends with a car allows for random adventures down town. And there are so many good programs that I'm already getting involved in.

So why am I ranting and raving about my school? Because I feel all this is a sign that God is faithful. I left PNG with so many fears. with anxiety of big college looming over me. with the stress to be a certain way so I could make friends. But God gently wrapped me up and said, "you know what. You'll be alright- I'll be with you. Dare to dream of a good time. I've got you." And I know that I have so many prayer warriors on my side going into this, and I'm grateful to each and everyone of them.

I love being here...yes in a Christian bubble, because this bubble doesn't squish my faith- it inspires it.
I love being here at a brand new place, with brand new people and I'm able to be whoever I want to be. So guess who I chose to be? ME. :) I feel like God has empowered me from day one to have the confidence in Him to be just who I am. I don't have to impress anyone. I don't have a past to make up for or a name to live up to. 

Of course it hasn't been all smooth sailing and I know there are bound to be many, many rough days ahead. But I know He WILL be my strength if I look to Him.

Thank you all for caring. Like everyone has said to me many times, "College is so much fun, and such a great part of your life." I've only been here for 2 weeks, and already am loving it. Just can't get enough. 

A giant step in a new direction...

So here I am again, back in the blogging world with renewed writing energy, new stories and probably-not-but-hopefully more time.
I realize I haven't blogged this entire summer and there is really no way I can catch you all up. I didn't put that pressure on me to try to keep up and at this point it's too much to think about to go all the way back, so I'm just picking back up right where I am, in the here and now.

The here and now is college. :) Yes. I am all moved into to my dorm room (which I lucked out and is one of the larger ones on campus.) I've met my roommate, who is a perfect match for me (so far). We've played capture the flag with our brother dorm. Watched movies. Gone to orientation seminars. Had chapel servives with awesome worship. Heard from the president. Gotten 2 free t-shirts. Free pizza. Free lunches. Free dinners. I stood in the 1 hour line to get my ID...which the photo is about the size of my thumbnail and was taken while the police office inhaled his Famous Amos cookies. We've had a surprise birthday party. Ran to Walmart for snacks. Watched a man twirl fire. Gone for walks. And then there was Deke Day.
And yes, this was all this weekend, as I moved my boxes of essential junk in on Friday.
It's been a crazy weekend, following a crazy summer, but I really couldn't be much more happy where I am.
I knew God called me to this place but He's been making that even more clearly evident to me as time goes on here. As I walk the sidewalks and smile at friendly places. As I meet sweet girls, and connect with random strangers. As speakers speak words of truth and the congregation I'm worshiping with is larger then any other I've been in. As I see godly men and women want to do the Lord's will and encourage each other. God is here. I am here. and that's all because of Him.

Yesterday afternoon we went on what Lee calls Deke day. Deke comes from a Greek word which means "to serve." And that is one of the things I love about this school. Last year alone they outputted over 72,000 hours of service. So as part of your orientation all the freshman kick off the year with a service project.
We split into groups and went and visited a total of 41 nursing homes. My group was bussed off to an Alzheimer's unit where we sat with, colored for, played Janga with, tried to talk with the patients. It was actually a really special time in which I was able to get over many of my fears or stereotypes I had of super elderly/alzheimers patients. And believe it or not, I would love to go back. Yes, it took unbelievable amounts of patience to repeat the same thing over and over again. and to be told the same thing over and over again. At times it was hard to get through to them. But they loved having us there. One lady thought we were spending the night and it made me so sad when she realized we wouldn't eat breakfast with her. I'm so ready to get out serve. Bring it.

This is stepping into something completely new, away from anything and everything that is familiar to me but I'm excited to see where God takes us. I know it's not going to be all smooth, happy sailing, but then how am I to grow? So here's to new beginnings. A direction. Another giant step forward.