So I realize as I personal blog I often, if not like always talk about me. How selfish. (and here I am talking about me, talking about me.) But I think for once in my life I'm tired of talking about me.
I understand that new friends and teachers want to get to know me. How nice.
But for classes I have to write an autobiography for my class Gateway (freshman orientation course), a "Where I am From" paper for College writing, a personal calling paper for my Missions of the Church class AND do a presentation of my life in a class.
You'd normally think that all these papers would be simple to write, but I'm personally finding them hard. I'm not trying to forget my life in PNG, but as I'm transitioning and starting a new life here I'm trying to focus on the here and now. Be content where I am. I'm excited to be here and I don't want to look back to much and remember all I miss. But these papers are forcing me to go back there. Relive the memories and the scenery. To be back in that moment and grasp that emotions. It's honestly...draining. I'm so emotionally tired and don't know how I'll have the strength to write the Where I'm From one this weekend.
And with friends...The first question after you get someone's name is either "what's your major?" or the MK's least favorite question, "where are you from?". There is really no way around it. I can't lie and say from Ohio, cause then they ask where, how long, why, highschool etc. And they'll find out sooner or later - we do have 4 years together. So I tell them...then they ask a million other questions. PNG is a HUGE part of my life, it made up who I am...but there is more to be then the country. --Do you play sports? Yeah soccer. -Well did you have a team over there? who'd you play? --It's so complicated just to answer simple questions.
So for once in my life I'm exhausted of the "simple questions", of talking about me. I'm tired of thinking about the "good ol' days" and putting my life out there for people to try to understand. So why am I doing exactly that by blogging? Cuz I just needed to get it off my mind and I don't have to answer any questions here. And there isn't a syllabus or outline I have to follow for this. But anyways...venting session. Off to work on my paper. Have a great weekend everyone!!! :)
*Hugs*
ReplyDeleteI hear you, girl! My dad's a pastor and I get so many PK questions that just drive me crazy. "Do you watch TV?" "Do you get to... have fun?"
I'm not kidding. Sometimes I just wish people were interested in my personality more than where I'm from or my dad's job.
I'll be praying that you can relax and that this autobiography won't stress you out too much.
I hear ya, Leslie. The questions will keep coming for a while, but there will come a time when all of your friends will know that you're an MK from PNG and they won't ask you all of the silly, over-used questions. You might have to explain the situation to new people when next year rolls around, but by then you'll be an older MK and you'll be established at Lee, so part of your identity will be rooted in that, too. You'll have plenty of other things to talk about with other students there as you establish friendships and make memories. Right now you might feel some belonging to Lee and that's good and fine, but it will definitely take time for Lee to start to feel like a home.
ReplyDeleteI'm praying for you and I promise it does get better! Hope the papers aren't too stressful.